Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Yes. I am sick today and have nothing else to do with my time...

So, I have spent most of my day sitting in bed (very "soft and delicious" as one friend would describe it) wading through the blogosphere. My sifting led me to an old blog post from my semester spent abroad. It almost took my breath away, revisiting my old thoughts from a time when I seemed to possess more wisdom than I realized. At least, the words are a new wisdom to the me sitting here (in bed) today.

Anyway, I thought I would share. The post describes a walk I took in Medjugorje in 2004.

I decided to walk up the rocky mountain barefoot. I had heard about others doing it, and I was so excited to add that physical penance to my spiritual prayer of the Stations of the Cross on the way up. And it was demanding. I think it took nearly two hours for us to reach the peak of the mountain.

But how can I explain how rewarding it was to experience that walk? I noticed that when I looked up the big rocks looked the most daunting. I was wary about walking through them. However, I quickly learned that the smaller stones were the sharpest and most painful to walk over. The larger stones had been rubbed smooth from millions of pilgrim feet over the past twenty years. And I saw how the rocks related to my life. The big sins in my life look the most daunting. I think that I will never get over them, or find forgiveness with them, or heal from them. And when I approach the big ones, it is always easier than I expected. The small stones represent the tiny day to day sins in my life. They cut the most because they are the hardest to rid myself of - and I am challenged every day by them. They are the tiny vices that create the biggest problems. I felt as if I had walked through the sins in my life on the Cross Mountain. I was performing a penance for my life with my body, but my soul was left to gaze at the beauty of the mountains and to speak with God in my heart.

...The way down Cross Mountain all I could think was how incredibly thankful I was for the simple gift of shoes in my life.

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